Mom made it through Christmas. I picked her up about 1:30pm and took her to the cemetery to place a poinsettia on her Mother's grave. Her tears flowed as I placed the flower in the middle of the wreath I had left for Grandma a couple of weeks ago. The snow on the ground made it so pretty as we drove around looking at all the beautiful flowers and wreaths people had left in memory of their loved ones.
As we drove up to the house Mom got a chance to see the outside lighting I have been working on for the last several weeks. I have to say, it looked pretty good..with the deer, the Snoopy Santa, the kids from Peanuts singing, and the magnolia tree full of lights.
Pamela was finishing dinner which was good because Mom was hungry. We had a Honey Bee Ham dinner....ham, potatoes au gratin, green bean casserole and sweet potato souffle. We had cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory that my brother had brought Mom for Christmas.
We opened presents next....Mom was totally surprised by all the gifts..an angel snow globe with music, a long shoe horn for getting her boots on, a nightgown, Frango chocolates, Daniel Green slippers (these were a huge hit), gingerbread cookies, and a handmade muffler from Pamela. After all of the excitement of presents and dinner, Mom wanted to go home.
The ride home was pretty hard. Mom cried ....big sobs...she feels so alone without Dad by her side. I have to say, I feel tremendous empathy for her...but she also drives me to distraction. We both tried to talk to her again about moving into an assisted living situation closer to us. She refuses to consider it.
She insisted on dragging her strong box with her important papers to our house and then back to her apartment. She thinks people are going into her apartment and stealing her things. I cannot convince her otherwise. This is the part where her paranoia really starts to drain me. Once I got her home and had unloaded all the presents, the strong box and the food that Pamela had packed up for her, I got her medicine and put her eye drops in her right eye. She continues to be in a lot of pain from the shingles.
Before I left, I arranged all of her food and gifts on her dining room table and on a chair by her Christmas tree. I thought it would be easier for her to pick up her gifts if she didn't have to bend down. I hugged her goodnight and left with a heavy heart. I wish the situation was easier for both of us...but especially for Mom. She is so lost, so alone, so frail. I have to keep reminding myself that she is choosing to live like this ...isolated in an apartment.
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