Sunday, July 6, 2008

This has been a long day and it is only 6:55pm. Woke up early at 4:30am and couldn't get back to sleep. Puttering around the house, doing laundry, drinking tea...then off to church at 9:30am. As is my usual routine, I drove out to Mom's after church to make her dinner. I also had another tower fan for her that needed a little assembly.

I made corn on the cob, mashed potatoes, and filet of sole. Mom had wanted to buy a huge ham slice, but I reminded her that she had gotten sick the last time she tried to swallow ham. She loved the filet of sole...so my substitution for the ham worked. She had made a fruit and jello salad for dessert. It was a good meal and she kept all of it down.

I put the fan together while Mom watched the Olympic trials on TV. I am glad the Summer Olympics are happening this year. It will give her something to watch on TV that she seems to enjoy. After I got the fan put together we placed it where she wanted it to be in her bedroom. Then I shifted gears to figure out why her "Pocket Talker" wasn't working. Luckily it was not a major problem, just needed new batteries, For those who don't know what a "Pocket Talker" is...it is an amplifier that uses headphones and a microphone to enhance sound. Mom got hers while Dad was still alive. I took them both the Speech and Deafness Clinic to get it. It seems to help Mom at the Doctor's office and when she is watching TV.

Today Mom said at the end of our visit that she couldn't manage without me. It is true but I don't like to dwell on it. I am just doing the best I can in a tough situation. She is lonely and lost without my Dad. She doesn't really want to keep living, but she has no way of knowing when her death will finally happen ...which for a control freak like Mom is very difficult to accept.

Tomorrow starts another week....work, twice daily phone calls to Mom, fixing dinner at Mom's on Tuesday night, my own therapy appt. on Monday night. I will just have to take it all one day at a time...on step at a time.