Sunday redux

Today I made an intentional choice to go to Mom's and be in a good mood. Nothing much was different with her, but my intention helped me make it through the usual routine in a much better mood.

Mom had made some really good macaroni and cheese. She said she hadn't made it in a really long time and wasn't sure if it was any good. She also mentioned that she had fallen asleep while it was baking and it might have cooked too long. My ears went up immediately at that....it may not be safe for Mom to use the oven any more. I finished off the meal by cooking her favorite ham slice in butter and brown sugar and fresh corn on the cob. She was really hungry and ate everything on her plate.

Pamela and took a drive out to Black Diamond and Enumclaw yesterday. We both just needed to get out of the city. Pamela slept off and on in the car...but we managed to stop at two really good farm stands. I bought Mom fudge, some salt water taffy, split peas. Pamela bought some corn and Walla Walla sweet onions that she put in the bag for Mom. We didn't have dessert after dinner because Mom ate a big piece of fudge BEFORE the meal. We laughed over that.

I took Mom to Northgate to give her a little time away from her apartment. I exchanged the bras that I bought her Friday night for another color. We headed for the grocery store and did our usual round of most of the aisles. Mom had made a list but she had no idea what she had put on it. I read it and reminded her at every turn what we were looking for. She drove the cart to the car and then I put everything in the car after getting her seated. She is increasingly unsure of her ability to walk without me holding on to her.

Next stop, Rite Aid to get her nightime pants. This has been going on since before Dad died. She gets up at least three times a night to go to the bathroom, but wears the pants too. I have never really asked her is she is incontinent, but I assume that she is and I just leave it alone. I think this may also be why she washes the sheets so much.

I looked at Mom with such compassion today. She is so tired, with bags and circles under her eyes. She has continued to loss weight. She misses my Dad and she misses the life they had together. I know Mom could drive Dad to distraction, but I also know that they loved each other in a way that was totally private between them.

To give Mom something to look forward to, I told her today that we are taking her to the Puyallup Fair next Sunday. My office mate at work gave me the wheelchair that she used with her Mom who has since passed away. That will save us from having to rent a chair like we did last year. Mom is looking forward to seeing all the produce, flowers, animals and the lovely food. Corn on the cob, fudge, hamburgers with piles of sauteed Walla Walla sweet onions...

Onto the week... tomorrow is Labor Day ...September 1st. Fall is right around the corner.